Understanding Desire

I believe that at this very moment I am learning a great deal about what it means to desire things in life. What causes them, what fuels them, and what prolongs the desire. First off, I think we choose what we want in life. Some may feel they've had too much direction towards their desires, as if their desires were pursauded or manipulated from something else. Others may feel they received no direction at all, and thus struggled in comprehending/living in a state of desire. Essentially both scenarios are relative because both scenarios explore a misconception of desire. Where desire is not accurate and alligned, it is a misconception of what it was truly intended to be. The definition of desire is "a strong feeling of wanting to have something or wishing for something to happen". Based on that difinition my first question is: how can I refine my interests in life and pick one "desire" above all else? My significant other explained to me that " you just have to pick something and go with it. Once you choose it don't second guess it, dedicate yourself to it." Like he chose me. Like how I know he's all in all the time. I gotta say I really think he's right.

I'm starting to feel like there's too many "whys" for the world. Take the first guy. he asked why his whole life, but at the end of his life he still died more or less just like the next guy. He asked all the questions, and searched and searched for an understanding. Minutes, hours, weeks, months, years and priceless energy poured into this knowledge. Who he was, where he came from, where he thought he was going....... They said he died with loads of knowledge, and understanding. Who's to say the one who practiced timelessness and mindfulness, and presentness would not have better spent the same amount of time doing absolutely nothing at all? Whose to say they did not die with the same amount of knowledge and understanding? Maybe after death, in pergatory "the pending state", would be a better time for all over the observing, speculating, and asking why. The more I ask it, the more I feel that I don't even want to know the answers anymore. I want to learn how not to ask why.

I want to be where I am without wondering where else I could go. I want to experience gratitude without being cloudy-minded from all the whys and hows. What kind of knowledge am I looking for? What do I really want to learn about the world? I understand that knowledge is power, but I also understand that there are some things in life not worth knowing. Wish me luck as I start a journey of refiance: Refining my desires down to something just big enough to build off of. Building and growth will be infinite from a clear starting point. As Oprah Winfrey says "You can have it all, you just can't have it all at once." But also I want to think about what I really want more clearly and in more detail. I don't think I need, or really want it all. I do however want the top of the line and the best of whatever I choose to desire. I think thats fair!

Photo credit to Darren Wood Photography